He just Pinched out a Dirty Bomb!

The following is a (hilarious) excerpt from this Rolling Stone article about one FBI anti-terrorism task force in Chicago:

The two officers tell me about a close call at the Taste of Chicago food festival last year. Millions attend the annual street feast, with Chicago-style sausage and pizza and tamales on sale in booths along the lakefront. As with all major public events, the JTTF helped plan the security profile. A JHAT —a Joint Hazardous Assessment Team —set up at the festival, dotting the area with devices that detect signs of a chemical or biological or radiological attack. Suddenly, one of the devices went off: There was a radiological hit on one of the sniffers near a row of porta-potties. For an hour, the JHAT frantically tried to determine if Chicago had been struck by a "dirty bomb" —a weapon that spreads lethal radioactive material mixed with conventional explosives. Finally, after an anxious hour, the hit was traced to a particular outhouse —and the cause of the positive alert was determined.

"Someone who had chemotherapy had just done a poop," DeRosa says.

As always I am delighted to hear of the appropriate measures being taken by the United States Government in the name of our security.

Kucinich can steal a show...

I would give a lot to see this man as commander and chief. I hope to 'science' he at least gets on as VP with someone. An Obama/Kucinich ticket would be music to my disenfranchised ears.

Hello, Kids! It's me-- MISTER 9-11 MAN!

"Mike Huckabee: Too stupid to be president."

Student: Many schools in Arkansas are failing to teach students about evolution according to the educational standards of our state. Since it is against these standards to teach creationism, how would you go about helping our state educate students more sufficiently for this?
Huckabee: Are you saying some students are not getting exposure to the various theories of creation?
Student (stunned): No, of evol … well, of evolution specifically. It’s a biological study that should be educated [taught], but is generally not.
Moderator: Schools are dodging Darwinism? Is that what you … ?
Student: Yes.
Huckabee: I’m not familiar that they’re dodging it. Maybe they are. But I think schools also ought to be fair to all views. Because, frankly, Darwinism is not an established scientific fact. It is a theory of evolution, that’s why it’s called the theory of evolution. And I think that what I’d be concerned with is that it should be taught as one of the views that’s held by people. But it’s not the only view that’s held. And any time you teach one thing as that it’s the only thing, then I think that has a real problem to it.

(http://www.ncseweb.org/resources/rncse_content/vol25/8118_is_evolution_arkansas39s_h_12_30_1899.asp)

"Mike, there is no such thing as "an established scientific fact." A theory is as good as you can get in science. Anyone who wants to be the leader of the free world, better know that or he's too ignorant of science for the job. And if you do know it, you've just proved yourself a liar."

"

IANAEB (I am not an evolutionary biologist) but as I understand it, the Theory of Evolution cannot ever be proven in totality. However, independently individual tenets of evolution are provable in so far as they are observable.

Consider:

• Gradualism
• Population speciation
• Natural selection
• The Law of Independent Assortment
• The Law of Segregation (not talking Jim Crow)
• Mutation
• Genetic drift
• Polyploidy of cells
• Hybridization
• Artificial selection
• Gene flow

But you know, all of that taken together in no way supports or validates the general Theory of Evolution. In no way. God says."

(http://politics.reddit.com/info/62226/comments/)

I really don't want any of these borderline demented Republicans leading this nation... I could handle Ron Paul but the rest are scary.

Cerebral palsy is not something to snicker about... you should be laughing out loud

Josh, my man, you are the definition of "overcome."

Josh Blue... an excellent, talented, and disabled stand up comic doesn't even have to try to make you smile. Watch this guy's act and try, just try, not to get this odd feeling like you two are great friends and you couldn't be more proud. Of course... who wouldn't be proud of a guy who not only refuses to let his handicap stop or slow him, but actually uses it to his comic benefit.

Watch, enjoy, and don't feel guilty for laughing at him... he thinks his disease is funnier than even you do:

NERD WARP

Every now and then I let the "geek" take over my brain and become the biggest nerd known to man. You ever watch that original Enterprise show on the Sci Fi channel? The one that supposedly took place right after the space station was built and way before all the totally far fetched Star Trek shit came about? WOW they make it so believable... the introduction even has a flight technology montage starting with the Wright brothers up to present day which supposedly gives way to *BLAMO* the Enterprise, all the technology you see in Star Trek, and, most importantly, a Vulcan played by some chick with a great tan and the hottest tits this side of the galaxy.

Have I freaked you out with my nerd attack yet? Well I just spent a few hours contemplating far fetched "future" technologies like Warp Drive... traveling faster than the speed of like, worm holes, time travel. Look I'm really sorry, but I'm stuck in New Jersey right now completely out of touch and I can't even go mountain biking because I fucked up my back yesterday, humor me and at least pretend like you give a shit.

Plus, none of this stuff is even that totally ridiculous, right? I mean... the articles I'm reading ARE on the NASA.gov website:

Warp Drive, When?

Don't Vote, DIEbold!

Everyones heard of the rigged Diebold voting machines and the scandal surrounding them. It's LESS known there are some alternative voting machine making companies like AutoMARK. Recently, Massachusetts AutoMARK to tally the votes in the state. A lucrative 9 million dollar contract, law makers research and approve such spending. Not to mention here in Boston and the rest of the state, we want our votes to COUNT.

As it turns out, this didn't make AutoMARK's competitor or the corrupt and Bush loving company Diebold all too happy. Now they are demanding the decision be overturned. Demanding? What even gives them the right to do that?

A Few Parking Tickets

One parking ticket is one parking ticket too many, especially in Boston where parking is at a premium. Add in the demented form of "thought" my stoned hippie DMB loving neighbors are capable of, and sometimes you get this:

I couldn't help the pictures I snapped. I'd love to meet the meter maid who gave a shit.